Another exciting instalment ! I have been refused Avastin-all political , I am afraid. If I lived in England there would be no problem , but living in Scotland , things are different. Anyway, my oncologist said there is an appeals procedure and that we should go ahead with that , as he thinks the drug would benefit me. I have written a patient statement ( basically a begging letter ), and it is now in the hands of the gods , or the board , to be more accurate!

I met up with my workmates for a long overdue catch-up and lunch . I have said before that my workmates are the best , and I stand by that! We went to Zizzi's in Glasgow and had a terrific time , and a terrific meal !

Bill and I haven't had a holiday for about five years , and it is very expensive to get travel insurance when you suffer from a condition like cancer . I was quoted £1,500 for one week's holiday in Europe-no chance , sorry! I started venting my spleen on Twitter , and got a message from a company called Flexicover to contact them as they said they could help - they sure did ! I got a quote for Bill and me for £29 for the week - big difference- will definitely recommend them!
So , Bill and I went for a week to Dublin - not too far away as I am still on daily injections of Heparin  , after the blood clot , and don't want to do long haul flights.
Was amazing-had never been before . Stayed in The Doubletree by Hilton -well , we are worth it! Dublin was very busy , more geared up to younger folk , I would say , but was very enjoyable . There are a lot of landmarks as Dublin has a great history and some very famous sons and daughters. Got my photo taken with a statue of the late Phil Lynott .

 A highlight ( for Bill ) , was a tour of the Guinness factory , , or the Guinness Storehouse , as it is known . It is seven floors of all things Guinness !

Was very interesting and very busy ! We got a chance to attend a tasters masterclass , which means we can call ourselves

Guinness tasters - I can't stand the stuff , but Bill enjoyed it! He also found his new favourite pub!

Another highlight was a visit to Dublinia . Had never heard of this before , but it was very interesting , and lasted about two and a half hours . The city bus tours were great , with some of the drivers singing Irish songs along the way . There was so much to see , that I think we will go back soon !

A few days after we got back from Dublin , Claire and I went on a wee trip to Manchester ( Claire's treat-thank you ).

We stayed at the Hilton , courtesy of Paul H. ( thank you ). It was very grand , if a little high up .

Our room was on the fifteenth floor - the view was terrific though !



We went on the

Coronation Street tour - which was fun . I am a great fan of "The Street" and it was a real treat for me. Claire and I got a couple of photos together .....

 and you might be able to see her bump, as she is carrying my first grandchild - something lovely to look forward to in October x x x

While in Manchester , we caught up with Paul , who has made his home there and is enjoying his drive time show on RealRadioXS.

We also visited the Trafford Centre-never seen anything like it in my life - amazing place - you could spend all day there ! Claire enjoyed the shopping experience !

                                                  

There is a "tweet-up" next week (5th July) down at Southwark cathedral in London , with a lot of my bowel cancer friends going along. I dearly want to go , and just might! you never know! Watch this space x x x

1st May: Went to Beatson today for results of ct scan.While the cancer hasn't spread to any other organs,there was no improvement noted after six months of chemo.The upshot is,I will be starting more chemo next month.Doctor wants to give me a bit of time for bone marrow to recover,and I will then start on my new regime- 5FU,Oxaliplatin,and Avastin. Oh well,let's party !!

I cannot believe it has been five months since I last put fingers to keyboard-(does anyone put pen to paper nowadays?).I apologise if anyone has been hanging on my every word and waiting for updates,but nothing much has been happening,to be honest.
I seemed to be sailing through my second course of chemo,and had a great Christmas and New Year with all the family.
January was January-cold and windy! I started to develop pains in my back whenever I took deep breaths .Being a nurse you automatically self-diagnose."It is just muscular" , I thought,"but I will mention it before I get my next chemo".
My sister gave me a lift in on the morning of my next chemo and spoke to the nurses.They took my observations.Temperature was high,which meant no chemo for me!I was admitted to the assessment unit in the Beatson and was examined from head to foot!I went for chest x-ray,which showed an opacity in my left lung.There were also decreased sounds in my left lung,so I was diagnosed as having a chest infection.I had a venflon inserted-they did not want to use my PICC in case that was the focus of the infection.I was started on IV antibiotics,and moved to a ward.I got a room to myself,which was nice!
My consultant came to see me the following day-nobody had informed him that I had been admitted-my sister happened to mention it to him,as she works beside him! He listened to my chest and said he would like to send me for a special lung scan,as he felt there could be more than an infection in my lung.He said that pelvic disease increases the chance of pulmonary embolism.I had the scan the next day and,sure enough,it showed I had pulmonary embolism,pulmonary infarction,and a super infection.Apart from that I was ok!I was started on daily injections of Heparin,to help break up the clot and was to continue on IV antibiotics as my temperature was still misbehaving.
The following day,the junior doctor came and told me that my blood tests showed that there was something wrong with my liver.She was going to send me for an ultrasound to see what was going on.I went for ultrasound next day,and the result showed no cancer,but a condition called non-alcoholic fatty liver.The doc said that this was probably caused by all of the chemo I had had and it should resolve in time.
Well, my temperature misbehaved for nearly two weeks-I had every blood test  under the sun .Was started on stronger IV antibiotics,had a blood transfusion (God bless blood donors!),and was very well looked after in the ward.The food left a lot to be desired,but I survived!
I was eventually discharged after two weeks,with a supply of injections to be administered by myself every day.I was used to giving other people injections , but had never had to inject myself before.
I let Bill do it for the first few days,but thought I might as well have a go,as he had to work late some nights,and it had to be given at roughly the same time.I managed fine!
I had a couple of weeks off chemo because of the PTE , but started back on it in late February.My hair had really thinned out to the point it looked better if it was cut really short.I got a lovely wig from a shop in Glasgow,but only wore it a couple of times.
Had a lovely Easter with all the family (apart from Richard and Shelley,who are in new York!), and have now completed the course of chemo.I can't say it bothered me too much-had occasional stomach cramps,but was never sick or bedridden because of it.
I had a scan last week (April 15) and am just patiently waiting on the results.I am ready for whatever it shows , but I would really like to get a holiday booked!No doubt the travel insurance will be sky high!

Tuesday 5th November.
Haven't written anything for a while-forgot my password and was too lazy to press a button to get a new one! Well,I pressed the button tonight!
I am back in the old chemo routine and it feels if it never stopped!Due my fourth round of 5FU and Irinotecan tomorrow.Things going smoothly so far-no nasty effects that some people have reported and warned me would happen.I guess everyone is different,so I just take each day as it comes.My hair is a bit thinner so I have a prescription to get a wig-might not bother,but it is nice to know I have the option.

A few nice things have happened since I last wrote.The nicest thing was that my daughter Claire got engaged to Paul -They went on holiday to New York and Paul proposed on the steps of Carrie Bradshaw's house-Claire is a big fan of Sex And The City! Claire was surprised but we were not,as Paul had already asked Bill for his permission to marry her.No date , as yet , for the wedding , but plenty of magazines have been bought!

The ring is gorgeous by the way!
I was at a concert in the newly opened SSE Hydro in The Proclaimers,and I had a great night-chemo is not going to keep me from enjoying myself as much as I can! They sang all their hits and more.It is a great venue,and I look forward to attending many more concerts there.

The Hydro

Glasgow-the group was
The following week I went to see Jamie Cullum at the Armadillo in Glasgow-another great concert from a guy we have been going to see for about ten years now!
Also went to the BBC Good Food Show at the SECC,and it was the best yet-Nice to see

James Martin-delicious!

James Martin giving a demonstration of what he does best!
I am not going to dwell on the chemo side of things,as it is just incidental in my life-I get it every fortnight and just deal with it.I drink loads of water on the days of chemo and a few days after,as this helps to keep my mouth clean and flush out the chemicals.Seems to work for me-simple but effective.I have a sleepless night on the first day of chemo,and this is due to the high dose of steroids that have been pumped in to me.I know it is going to happen and have accepted it,so just live with it-I sleep well every other night.
One of my workmates retired recently and we went out for a meal to a place called Citation,in Glasgow's Merchant City.Was lovely to see the girlies again and catch up with all the gossip from work.They truly are the best bunch of people I have ever worked with.Wasn't too impressed with the meal but I won't badmouth that on here.
I got a lovely present through the post a few weeks ago-it was from Gail,one of my Twitter buddies-we had started a group ,originally the famous five,but numbers grew,so we are now #lucky8.Basically we are all going through the same thing at the moment.Gail decided to cheer us all up and sent a bag of

magic beans!I planted them as soon as they arrived and they grew within two weeks-they are still growing-lovely thought!
I joined a gym recently ! It is all part of a joint initiative -CANmove-between Macmillan Cancer Care and Glasgow Sport-fully funded by Macmillan. It was very enjoyable and I am glad I went-wish more folk would take advantage of it though,as there were only two of us there!
Rosie went to Berlin for a few days for work(alright for some).Steven was on nightshift,so Alan stayed with us -he seemed to

Alan enjoying meringue from the Good Food Show!

enjoy himself!Steven is a great artist in his spare time-this is one of his

works

Bonfire night tonight-our dog Bobo is a nervous wreck at this time of year-don't know what happened to the poor beast when he was younger-we are the third family to own him.I decided to buy him a collar with inbuilt calming pheromones added to see if it would help him.He has had it on for a few days and seemed ok but he is back to his slobbering quivering self tonight.Oh well,back to the drawing board.....
I am attending the Scottish parliament next week.It is an event to meet up with MSPs,and people associated with the charity Beating Bowel Cancer,patients , and families.It should be interesting. Although the NHS is UK wide,treatments for cancers vary in Scotland,England,Ireland,and Wales.Some drugs readily available in England are not so readily available in Scotland .Even bowel screening is targeted at different age groups.I look forward to meeting up with some  people I met at the patient day in London in April.

25th september-Back in the old routine.
Early start as I was getting PICC line inserted at 8:30 am and then chemo at lunchtime.Rosie gave me a lift in as she was working.Parked car at Pond Hotel and walked along the waterside to see the ducks and swans and geese just floating by without a care in the world

.Went in to the shop to buy a baguette for lunch-£2:95-daylight robbery-will make my own next time!Went and checked in at reception and was taken straight away.The nurse was called Donna and explained everything to me before carrying out the procedure.My last PICC line had been in my left arm,as I have a longstanding injury to my right arm.Donna said she would have to put it in my right arm this time,but would do her utmost to make it successful! Thankfully,everything went according to plan,although she did say it was in the top five of the most difficult ones she had had to do! I never felt any discomfort at all and was very grateful for that! I then had to go for x-ray to check the line was in place,and once it was checked out,I was good to start the chemo.
I had to have bloods taken before chemo,because the full set hadn't been checked at my clinic appointment on Monday.Meant a bit of waiting about,but again,very grateful for the proper procedures being carried out.
Eventually got taken to my area and was delighted to see the familiar faces of my nurses-I had a great deal of faith in their expertise and knowledge.I was hooked up to the anti-emetic first and then started on the new drug Irinotecan. I was warned there could be abdominal cramps and an increased flow of saliva ,but,if that was the case,I would be given an injection of Atropine to counter those effects.As it turned out,I had none of those effects.I was then hooked up to Folinic Acid in Glucose for two hours,then 5FU for ten minutes,and then the pump which would come home with me for the next forty eight hours.
During my stay I had brought in my iPad ,onto which I had downloaded some of my favourite comedy shows,namely Frasier,Still Game,and Father Ted.I actually laughed my way through the whole of my chemo-people think I am mad,but I don't care.
After getting my supplies of steroids,anti nausea meds,and anti diarrhoea meds,sharps box,dressings,appointments,it was time to go home-5pm.it had been a long day,but a lot was achieved.Rosie gave me a lift home . As I was emptying my bag,I found my baguette-I had forgotten all about it!Couldn't take it now,because it had been out of fridge all day-oh well,the dog had a wee treat!Me? , I had toast and banana  x

September 5th 2013-Going to Beatson to get result of PET scan.There are so many scenarios that I go through in my mind as to what the results will be,but there is no point in trying to second guess- the results will be known soon enough!
Bill and I took the train to Hyndland station,which is adjacent to the Beatson.We were a bit early,but I would rather be early than be rushing about at the last minute.We were eventually lead in to the doctor's room and he told us that the scan had shown three abnormalities rather than the original one.They were of a similar size and he said that surgery would probably not be an option at this point.The areas affected were in the peritoneum.My lungs and liver were clear and all the bloods I had taken were normal.
The doctor said that I would probably be best getting chemotherapy again-a slightly different regime which would not last as long as the previous one.Side effects could be diarrhoea,upset stomach,and a rash.
After we left the hospital,I was busy sending texts to family and friends-isn't technology wonderful!

The upshot is that I am now waiting to go and have another PICC line inserted and then it's back on the bandwagon! I feel I am in a better condition than I was in last time,as I had just had major surgery before the last round. Oh well,onwards and upwards.....again!

Another wee update,as it has been a while. August used to be my favourite month-my birthday is in August , and I got married in August twenty nine years ago!
I had a lovely birthday and got spoiled as usual,but my poor mum was in hospital as she had fallen and broken her leg two weeks previously,so that put a bit of a dampener on things.
Another ct scan(my routine six monthly one) was due on 9th August.I was getting used to them by now,so they held no fear for me.My clinic appointment for the result was on the 16th August,so not too long to wait for the result!A lot of my bowel cancer buddies call the feeling of waiting for results "scanxiety"-a great description.
Anyway,scan came and went, but mum was not really doing all that well-she had survived the operation but went in to renal failure.My sister , husband,and the rest of the family and I were working during the day and spending visiting  times with mum.
At 3:30 am on Friday 16th August I got a call from the hospital to say that mum had taken a turn for the worse.I phoned my sister,and we(Bill and I and Rosie) went to the hospital,only to be told mum had already passed away.I kind of suspected that,because you don't generally get a call during the night with good news!The next few hours are a bit hazy,but I did have an appointment to see my oncologist at 10am that morning and felt I shouldn't miss it.
Bill and Rosie went with me to the hospital and I was taken in to see the registrar,which is unusual because I usually see the consultant. Anyway,he told me that there was a lesion on my pelvis which would need further investigation.At this point my consultant came in to the room and explained that he did not know what the lesion was but it was highly suggestive of a secondary deposit.I was quite numb,probably because I was so tired after being rudely awakened during the night!He said it was about 2.4 cm , but I would need a PET scan to determine what it was.He also said the best option at this point would be surgery,and they would discuss my case at the MDT meeting the following Monday.
Got a lot of bloods taken,as I am still on the SCOT trial,then just went home and started to arrange mum's funeral.
The following Monday afternoon,my oncologist phoned me and said my case had been discussed at the MDT meeting.The surgeon who had done my previous surgery was there and said he would do any surgery I needed-this immediately bucked me up.because I have a great deal of faith in his expertise and judgement.
Mum's funeral went ahead on Friday -lovely service-she would have approved!
So basically.we are in limbo at the moment-I had my PET scan this afternoon (30th August) and won't get the result till next Thursday. I must admit,the scan itself was nothing to worry about-Fasting for six hours beforehand,but drinking plenty of plain water.Injection of a radioactive sugar, drinking Gastrografin,lounging about for about one hour to let the isotope circulate,then lying still on the scanning couch for about half an hour. If anyone is going for one,I would advise they take some reading material , or a personal music player. If you are in to meditation,lying on the scanning couch would be the perfect opportunity to do it! I am not in to meditation,so just lay there trying to let my mind go blank( maybe that's what meditation is!)! I was told I would be radioactive for the rest of the day,so had better keep away from folk for the moment!